Some FAQs about our adoption!

I wanted to share some more details and information about our adoption!

• We are currently clients of Christian Adoption Consultants. After doing some research, we found that working with a consultant was a great option for us. It is an extra cost in the adoption process, however, our consultant is walking us through everything and answering all of our questions. This will allow us to avoid a lot of the "red tape" and riskier situations. Because we are working with a consultant, we will be able to apply to a few different adoption agencies located throughout the country rather than one local agency. This allows the timeline to go a little faster. Typically, a family may wait 2-3 years or more working with one agency. The average timeline for CAC clients is 4-10 months!
• As soon as our home study is completed and approved, we will become active clients. This means that any situations that match our preferences will be sent to us. We will decide whether we would like to present or not, and if so, the birth mother will review our profile along with other family profiles and ultimately decide on a family for her baby.
• If she chooses us, we will officially be matched! Each situation could look very different. We could be matched with a mother who is due within a few weeks or a few months. CAC works with "safe" states, meaning the birth mother has at maximum 72 hours to make a decision.
• Once we leave the hospital, we will be staying locally until the state approves our ICPC (The Interstate Compact on the Placement of Children) paperwork. Then, we will come back to Alabama, schedule post-placement visits with our social worker, and finalize the adoption!

We are so thankful for the support from our friends and family. Please continue to pray for this process and for the expectant mother and baby!

Don't forget we have a few different fundraising options going on right now:

Through April 21, you can purchase a t-shirt through our campaign on Bonfire.

https://www.bonfire.com/adopting-baby-fazenbaker/

This puzzle will be hanging in the baby's nursery. For every $25 donation, we will write your name on the back of a piece. We have sold 44 out of 252! Great way to show who was a piece of the process ;-)

You may also donate directly to us through our YouCaring website.

https://www.youcaring.com/nathanielkelleyfazenbaker-764592

Our Story

I have wanted to type this up for a while now, but have debated about what I would say. Without going into too much detail, I wanted to share our story and how it led us to adoption.

Nathaniel and I decided in September 2015 we were ready to grow our family. A few months later, we were officially trying. We both knew it could potentially take up to a year for things to happen, so we tried our best to just see where the year would take us and enjoy what could probably be the last several months with just the two of us.

Month after month of negative signs, I just kept telling myself, "It's fine. We'll keep trying. Some couples wait YEARS and go through so many losses before having a successful pregnancy. I cannot complain." I was disappointed, yes, but still not getting nearly as upset as I expected to. I had always wanted this, but something inside me told me it might not happen. That was a scary thought. But not once did I have a "meltdown" moment. Those that know me well know that I do not show a lot of emotion. It takes a LOT or something HUGE to even make me cry. So why was I not mourning the fact that I was not pregnant?? What is wrong with me?? I honestly didn't understand it.

When we finally made the decision to go in for tests, I just kept thinking, "What if we wasted all this time and there is something wrong? How frustrating!" Ha! It took until just a couple of weeks ago for me to realize that the year was not wasted whatsoever. God took 2016 to change us. We grew closer through our excitement, frustrations, and disappointment. He was preparing us for something even bigger than we could imagine...

Around the time we were going through testing, I came across a blog about a couple who was adopting. I followed her story and thought how amazing it is that there is an outlet like adoption to not only give babies a loving, stable home, but to allow couples to become parents who may otherwise be unable to. One of the things Nathaniel and I questioned a lot while we were trying was why there are so many unwanted, unexpected pregnancies that end with children in difficult situations or aborted, when there were so many couples who long to be parents, yet couldn't for various reasons. 

The closer we got to a final answer concerning our medical tests, the more we started talking about adoption. Even though it had been placed on my heart and had been something I was looking into more and more, Nathaniel was the first one to say, "Maybe this is what we're meant to do. If we are unable to have biological children, we can become parents through adoption." Goodness gracious, I could have squeezed him to pieces in that moment!

So, we made the decision before we got our final results. Rather than going through possibly years of fertility treatments with no successful pregnancies (our chances were very low even if that was a possibility), we want to be parents more than anything, so we would adopt. This was God's plan for us all along.

Adoption is by no means an easy way out. It is not for the faint of heart. We know we have a major journey ahead of us. I know someday I may break down over not going through pregnancy. Over not having some of the typical experiences others may have. But God decided to send our baby a different way, and I am okay with that. Motherhood>Pregnancy. Can someone make that into a shirt?? Seriously, though. Once I have that baby in my arms, every single part of this journey will be worth it. It already is! This baby is so loved, spoiled, and prayed for already that it makes my heart so happy. I am praying daily for the expectant mom that will make the decision to place her baby. Who will choose us. How special is that?! God has chosen our baby and the expectant mom who will bring them into the world. He will lead us to them, all in His timing. We will just be praying and preparing until then!